Heather Martin Reporting News

and I've never really gotten in a big fight w/ him until today. The story goes, my brother, who lives in michigan, was coming home w/ his wife and 2 kids for a wedding. the wedding was for a high school buddy and it was in syracuse, where we are from and my mom and dad still live in the area. they were bringing the kids because they were supposed to go to the wedding to, otherwise they would have left the kids home. it's just easier that way. driving from michigan to syracuse w/ 2 little kids isn't the most relaxing thing. i talked to my dad on wed. i happened to be driving back from a conference in indianapolis back to my mom's in eaton, ny about an hour or so from syracuse. i always plan to stay w/ my mom. she lives w/ stepdad and have lots of room and it's very cozy. my dad recently got remarried and his wife has custody of her 2 little grandkids plus there's a stepsister living there around 21 years old who i don't really know so w/ that there's not much room at his place and not much coziness. so of course my brother is staying w/ my mom since she has the room for everyone. as it went he stayed in a hotel room friday and saturday night because he was doing wedding stuff, he was in the wedding party, and it wasn't the best idea to drive all the way back to my mom's late at night after being out. so my mom took care of the kids while they were gone. i took vacation because i knew the kids would be in town and i hadn't seen them in about a year so i wanted to spend all the time i could w/ them.

so i talked to my dad wed. on my drive back from indianapolis to say i would be home late that night and my brother was coming in on thurs. and i'd somehow get the kids to see him over the weekend since my brother would be at the wedding. he seemed fine. my brother also talked to him that night and now i'm finding out that my dad was real upset and bringing up my parents divorce 17 years ago for making things difficult now w/ seeing the kids, like it's our fault, he always blames my mother like he had no part in the divorce, and also saying that kids shouldn't move away from their parents. sounds real rational. so they were in a big fight and the conversation ended w/ my dad saying fine don't bring the kids to see me, go to your wedding.

so on thurs. first you drive thru liverpool before getting to my mom's so my brother ended up stopping at my dad's work. then when he got off work they went to his house and stayed until my dad said he had to go pick up 'his kids' (the grandkids that his wife has custody of and live with). so my brother came to my mom's and we spent thursday night there. then on friday and saturday basically my brother was off doing wedding stuff in syracuse and me and mom were w/ the kids. the kids ended up not going to the wedding because it was too much hassle.

i hadn't talked to dad since wed. but my brother said that he told dad he would try and get the kids to see him again. my brother ended up staying until monday morning instead of leaving on sunday so i figured sunday was a better day because my dad had to work on sat. anyway. so then sunday came and my brother called my dad but he didn't answer and he left a message. we never heard from him.

so on monday i left dad a message saying that i was here until wed. and if he could do dinner monday or tuesday night. today i get a message from dad and it says something like 'It's your father...Martin...thanks' and the tone is all mad. So i call him back and he's out to eat at Mother's Restaurant, he eats there all the time and we get in a big fight. He's mad i didn't call him again after wed. and i say that i was w/ the kids and jeremy had been in touch w/ him so i figured he knew what was going on and how we tried to call on sunday but didn't get a hold of him and he said he wasn't answering the phone, so how can we arrange stuff if you don't answer? he thought we were coming w/ the kids Saturday night to Mother's and that he told my brother but my brother never told me and according to my brother he didn't make any plans for me to do that and my dad gets all crazy yelling about how my stepdad ruined our family and he's not coming to my mom's to see his grandkids as my brother had suggested in the voicemail.

so basically my brother had this big fight w/ my dad about the kids on wed. before even leaving michigan that i never knew about until today. my dad was looking for anything to be mad about. he told me when they came on thurs. that they just did it because they felt bad and that the whole time at his house they were yawning and seemed uncomfortable, maybe because they just drove all day w/ two little kids and just wanted to get settled in. then dad was questioning if they went to the lake, the lake is where the in-laws go in the summer and my brother has stayed there before so that's just my dad again being retarded about them not staying w/ him even though there's no room. and also my dad must be mad about the fact that he's 60 years old and now stuck at home w/ 2 little kids w/ handicaps. again, you chose that life, it's not our fault or our fault that you're divorced and we have to try and please everyone. both me and my mother have gone out of our way to see the kids, even if we've had to drive to the in-laws or go to michigan. it's not easy for my brother to get around, and again he came here for a wedding.

it's ridiculous to bring up shit from 17 years ago and to take your situation w/ your new life out on us. you didn't call us either. instead you ignored calls from us. that only makes the situation worse! now we don't want to deal w/ you. you're being unreasonable! i wanted to see my niece and nephew as much as i could. opportunities like this are very few. i knew i would have more time to see my dad after they left, and i did just see my dad in october and i could see him again, easier than seeing my niece and nephew in michigan.

not sure if i got all the sides represented here but that's the story kinda.